The Fear that Brings Life and Blessing

[Transcript of Strategic Families Podcast Episode #049, published 12/31/2023]

Published 12/31/2023

Hey everybody – welcome back to the Strategic Families podcast. Great to be with you all again. It has been a while!

Long story short, I went back to five days a week at work, which has been great – but it’s difficult to continue podcasting with that schedule! We’re hoping to start putting out some more episodes this year, but they will be less frequent than before. I’m putting this out now because it was part of my Christmas present to Jesus back in 2022 and my deadline was by the end of 2023! So here we are.

Today’s topic is a little off the beaten path of the kind of thing we normally explore. But it’s something I’ve been learning about and trying to grow in, and I think it’s a really powerful concept not only for our families, but also our culture. What I’m talking about is fearing the LORD. Listen, I know this is not a popular topic in our culture, or even within the church. But it is deeply, deeply biblical. We hear a lot about how we shouldn’t fear anything, and I get that. I would just clarify that we should indeed have a fear of God. The Bible clearly and explicitly and repeatedly tells us not to fear man or circumstances, but it is so absolutely filled with references to fearing the LORD. So when you hear the term “God-fearing people” – that’s a good concept rooted in Scripture. If the idea of fearing the LORD is not something you’ve ever thought about much, join the club – I hadn’t either until recently.

When I say fear of the LORD, let’s define the term. How I believe the Bible presents it is a holy, reverent, awe-filled acknowledgement of Who He is and what He is capable of and acknowledgment of the fact that He alone has the right to make demands on our lives – and, I would add, a true fear of the LORD compels our obedience. So that would be my definition. But before we get into the meat of what biblical fear of the LORD looks like, let me provide a little context on why this topic matters so much to me. There are three reasons. 

The first reason is my own sin struggle on the topic of fear. In my flesh, I love to please people. Very often the goal with any conversation or interaction or relationship I have is to get people to like me. I’m not sure where this comes from – maybe it’s being a middle child? – but I desperately want others to feel good about whatever interaction they have with me. I want them to feel good about themselves or their product or their viewpoint or whatever. Needless to say, this means I have a very hard time saying no. Some of this sounds fine on the surface, right? Of course spreading love or good cheer or encouragement can have its benefits. But there’s a HUGE potential problem with this mode of operating: if your ultimate goal is to please people, you will be tempted to engage in all kinds of things that don’t please the LORD, or neglect things that DO please Him. You will be tempted to not say things that need to be said, or to call out things that need to be called out, or to not say “no” because you’re scared of letting someone down, or to make promises that you can’t keep, or to keep up an image rather than proclaim the truth. For example, imagine a brother who’s trapped in sin. Is it loving to make this person feel good about this area of his life? Absolutely not. And if I had an area of sin, it would not be loving for someone else to allow me to feel good about it. Our culture has bombarded us with the lie that we must affirm people in whatever they want to do. No, no and triple no – friends, this is not love. And I would ask anyone who knows me: please don’t affirm me in whatever I want to do! We do no one any favors by affirming something that is not true or would harm them.

Point is: people-pleasing is not a biblical approach to relationships. LOVING people is a biblical approach – and that sometimes means speaking hard truths that people need to hear – that I need to hear. I’ve come to believe that people-pleasing demonstrates a lack of fear of the LORD. It shows that at least in those moments, I care more about what people think than about what God thinks. I can’t speak for everyone, but for me, people-pleasing can easily be just a form of people-FEARING. And it’s not OK and I can’t justify it. It’s wrong and it dishonors God; that’s called sin. It’s been a struggle all of my adult life and it’s a sin of which the LORD has been convicting me. There’s lots of room to grow. So that’s Reason #1.

The second reason I want to address this topic is because we see so much lack of the fear of the LORD in our day. And it’s devastating. We see it in so many ways. Think about how easily and often the LORD’s holy Name is used lightly or in vain or even as a curse. I recently attended an event where His Name was used over and over and over, dozens of times, and it genuinely grieved me. Every time I heard it was like nails on a chalkboard. Or think about how many people are rejecting God’s good created order, questioning or rejecting basic biology. This is so lamentable. It would be one thing if this were just a crazy theory in some ivory tower of liberal academia. But it’s hurting real people in the real world – how incredibly sad. And now, children are increasingly led astray with these despicable lies. As John Stonestreet of the Breakpoint podcast likes to say, “Bad ideas have victims.” All of the gender nonsense inundating our culture is devastating, and it’s clear evidence of a lack of fear of the LORD. Or, think about the parading of sin, like attempts to redefine marriage, or the promotion of sexual promiscuity, or the lust for quick riches and the exaltation of pleasure. Or think of the offensive “prosperity Gospel”, which twists the Word of God to be about personal enrichment and satisfaction. All of these reveal a lack of fear of the LORD. In effect, what someone who does not fear the LORD is saying ….​ is “What I feel…”​ or “What I want…”​ or “What makes me happy…”​ or “What energizes me…”​ or “What makes sense to me…”​ “… is more important to me than what God says.” While they may not say it, this is what they’re believing. Listen to Psalm 36:1-4: Transgression speaks to the wicked deep in his heart; there is no fear of God before his eyes. For he flatters himself in his own eyes that his iniquity cannot be found out and hated. The words of his mouth are trouble and deceit; he has ceased to act wisely and do good. He plots trouble while on his bed; he sets himself in a way that is not good; he does not reject evil. And this is a problem even within the church, as we can fall into these temptations and sins as well. Point is: so many bad, bad things will result in our lives, families, communities and the wider culture if we don’t fear the LORD.

But if we stop there, we will miss another critically important aspect of this topic. It’s great to recognize the sin of people-pleasing and repent and turn away from it. And it’s great for us to recognize how harmful it can be to not fear the LORD. But we need to take this a step further and TURN TO fearing the LORD. And this leads me to Reason #3 – I want to convince you why you should fear the LORD. And while it’s not why we should fear Him, I want to help you see the blessings of fearing the LORD. Fearing the LORD means we’re living for Him and not ourselves and our reputation; that His opinion is the only one that ultimately matters; that there’s nothing better we could want for ourselves or for others than what He wants; that what His Word says is what settles it for us. But here’s the really cool thing. It’s great to realize that fearing the LORD is what we should do, because that’s what the Bible calls us to. If we claim the name of Christ, the fact that He calls us to it – that is and ought to be enough for us. But what’s so awesome is that the Bible teaches us there are so many wonderful benefits to fearing the LORD, gifts from our kind Heavenly Father. When we choose to exercise a holy, honoring, reverent fear and respect for Him and His Word, there are just loads of blessings He showers on us. How cool is that? Again, this is not why we fear Him – we do it because He is worthy of it and it pleases Him. But His Word is telling us that what He wants from us is also what will tremendously bless us! We often get that mixed up, but that’s always the case: whatever brings Him glory is also for our good. And I will say, just my opinion, but if He didn’t want us to be excited about all of these benefits, why would He have listed them in His Word? We would do well to examine these and ponder them!

As I’ve been reading the Word the last couple of years, I’ve been jotting down verses about fearing the LORD and I wanted to walk through a bunch of those with you today. I’m attempting to make a biblical case for why fearing the LORD is not just a necessary thing but a life-giving aspect in your walk with the LORD and in the life of your family. Obviously there’s nothing especially family-oriented about this topic, but we can certainly apply it to our family life and teach our kids why fearing the LORD is such a good thing. That’s going to be the bulk of this episode and I’m confident that when you hear these, you’ll be convinced that fearing the LORD is the call of every believer in Christ and will be a tremendous blessing in your life and family.

There are two acknowledgements I want to give that surround this topic. The first is Jim Wright, a wonderful man of God and founder of the company I work for, FHG, which stands for “For His Glory.” Jim once did a Bible Study study years ago that focused on the fear of the LORD that impressed me so much. He went through a catalog of benefits to fearing the LORD and while I don’t remember the list, I’m sure much of what I’m going to share today overlap with that list. And I’m so grateful to Jim for helping me see the value of this topic! The second acknowledgement is to the book When People are Big and God is Small by Edward T. Welch. Obviously this deals primarily with fear of man versus fear of God. Haven’t finished it yet but so far I have loved it – so many excellent points. It’s an older book, published in 1997, but sometimes those are the best.

OK, so what does the Bible say and teach about fearing the LORD? So many things. 

Let’s first look at WHY we should fear Him:

• Deuteronomy 10:17 – For the Lord your God is God of gods and Lord of lords, the great, the mighty, and the awesome God, who is not partial and takes no bribe.​
• 1 Chronicles 29:11 – Yours, O Lord, is the greatness and the power and the glory and the victory and the majesty, for all that is in the heavens and in the earth is yours. Yours is the kingdom, O Lord, and you are exalted as head above all.
• Isaiah 45:5a – I am the Lord, and there is no other;​ apart from me there is no God.​
• Deuteronomy 4:24 – For the Lord your God is a consuming fire, a jealous God.
• Psalm 33:8-9 – Let all the earth fear the Lord; let all the inhabitants of the world stand in awe of him! For he spoke, and it came to be; he commanded, and it stood firm.
• Psalm 113:4 – The Lord is high above all nations, and his glory above the heavens!
• Philippians 2:9-11 – Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.
• Psalm 76:11-12 – Make your vows to the Lord your God and perform them; let all around him bring gifts to him who is to be feared, who cuts off the spirit of princes, who is to be feared by the kings of the earth.
• Psalm 147:10‭-‬11 – His delight is not in the strength of the horse, nor his pleasure in the legs of a man, but the Lord takes pleasure in those who fear him, in those who hope in his steadfast love.
• Psalm 89:6-9 – For who in the skies can be compared to the Lord? Who among the heavenly beings is like the LORD, a God greatly to be feared in the council of the holy ones, and awesome above all who are around him? O LORD God of hosts, who is mighty as you are, O LORD, with your faithfulness all around you? You rule the raging of the sea; when its waves rise, you still them.
• Jeremiah 10:6‭-‬7 – There is none like you, O Lord; you are great, and your name is great in might. Who would not fear you, O King of the nations? For this is your due; for among all the wise ones of the nations and in all their kingdoms there is none like you.
• ‭‭Revelation‬ ‭15:3‭-‬4‬ ‭– And they sing the song of Moses, the servant of God, and the song of the Lamb, saying, “Great and amazing are your deeds, O Lord God the Almighty! Just and true are your ways, O King of the nations! Who will not fear, O Lord, and glorify your name? For you alone are holy. All nations will come and worship you, for your righteous acts have been revealed.”

This, my friends, is a God worthy to be feared. There is no one like Him. He alone is glorious and all-powerful and all-knowing and exalted! All other gods are non-existent, worthless idols. He alone has the authority to demand our ultimate obedience and devotion.

So, are you in? Good. As we discussed earlier, He showers His blessings on those who fear Him. So let’s explore this topic.

He provides WISDOM

• Proverbs 15:33 – The fear of the Lord is instruction in wisdom, and humility comes before honor.
• Proverbs 9:10 – The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is insight.
• Psalm 25:12-14 – Who is the man who fears the Lord? Him will he instruct in the way that he should choose. His soul shall abide in well-being, and his offspring shall inherit the land. The friendship of the Lord is for those who fear him, and he makes known to them his covenant.
• Psalm 111:10 – The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom; all those who practice it have a good understanding. His praise endures forever!

He provides CONFIDENCE and STABILITY

• Proverbs 14:26 – In the fear of the Lord one has strong confidence, and his children will have a refuge. 
• Proverbs 24:21‭-‬22 – My son, fear the Lord and the king, and do not join with those who do otherwise, for disaster will arise suddenly from them, and who knows the ruin that will come from them both?

He provides LIFE and ABUNDANCE

• Proverbs 14:27 – The fear of the Lord is a fountain of life, that one may turn away from the snares of death.
• Proverbs 19:23 – The fear of the Lord leads to life, and whoever has it rests satisfied; he will not be visited by harm.
• Proverbs 10:27 – The fear of the Lord prolongs life, but the years of the wicked will be short.
• Proverbs 22:4 – The reward for humility and fear of the Lord is riches and honor and life.
• Psalm 128:1‭-‬4 – Blessed is everyone who fears the Lord, who walks in his ways! You shall eat the fruit of the labor of your hands; you shall be blessed, and it shall be well with you. Your wife will be like a fruitful vine within your house; your children will be like olive shoots around your table. Behold, thus shall the man be blessed who fears the Lord.
• Psalm 103:15‭-‬19 – As for man, his days are like grass; he flourishes like a flower of the field; for the wind passes over it, and it is gone, and its place knows it no more. But the steadfast love of the Lord is from everlasting to everlasting on those who fear him, and his righteousness to children’s children, to those who keep his covenant and remember to do his commandments. The Lord has established his throne in the heavens, and his kingdom rules over all.
• Psalm 31:19‭-‬20 – Oh, how abundant is your goodness, which you have stored up for those who fear you and worked for those who take refuge in you, in the sight of the children of mankind! In the cover of your presence you hide them from the plots of men; you store them in your shelter from the strife of tongues.
• Deuteronomy 6:1‭-‬3 – “Now this is the commandment—the statutes and the rules—that the Lord your God commanded me to teach you, that you may do them in the land to which you are going over, to possess it, that you may fear the Lord your God, you and your son and your son’s son, by keeping all his statutes and his commandments, which I command you, all the days of your life, and that your days may be long. Hear therefore, O Israel, and be careful to do them, that it may go well with you, and that you may multiply greatly, as the Lord, the God of your fathers, has promised you, in a land flowing with milk and honey.”
• Proverbs 23:17‭-‬18 – Let not your heart envy sinners, but continue in the fear of the Lord all the day. Surely there is a future, and your hope will not be cut off.
• Jeremiah 32:37‭-‬41 – Behold, I will gather them from all the countries to which I drove them in my anger and my wrath and in great indignation. I will bring them back to this place, and I will make them dwell in safety. And they shall be my people, and I will be their God. I will give them one heart and one way, that they may fear me forever, for their own good and the good of their children after them. I will make with them an everlasting covenant, that I will not turn away from doing good to them. And I will put the fear of me in their hearts, that they may not turn from me. I will rejoice in doing them good, and I will plant them in this land in faithfulness, with all my heart and all my soul.
• Proverbs 28:14 – Blessed is the one who fears the Lord always, but whoever hardens his heart will fall into calamity.
• Psalm 34:11‭-‬14 – Come, O children, listen to me; I will teach you the fear of the Lord. What man is there who desires life and loves many days, that he may see good? Keep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking deceit. Turn away from evil and do good; seek peace and pursue it.
• 1 Chronicles 16:23‭-‬27 – Sing to the Lord, all the earth! Tell of his salvation from day to day. Declare his glory among the nations, his marvelous works among all the peoples! For great is the Lord, and greatly to be praised, and he is to be feared above all gods. For all the gods of the peoples are worthless idols, but the Lord made the heavens. Splendor and majesty are before him; strength and joy are in his place.
• Psalm 112:1‭-‬3 – Praise the Lord! Blessed is the man who fears the Lord, who greatly delights in his commandments! His offspring will be mighty in the land; the generation of the upright will be blessed. Wealth and riches are in his house, and his righteousness endures forever. 

He provides DELIVERANCE and SALVATION and SAFETY

• Psalm 33:18‭-‬22 — Behold, the eye of the Lord is on those who fear him, on those who hope in his steadfast love, that he may deliver their soul from death and keep them alive in famine. Our soul waits for the Lord; he is our help and our shield. For our heart is glad in him, because we trust in his holy name. Let your steadfast love, O Lord, be upon us, even as we hope in you.
• Psalm 85:9 – Surely his salvation is near to those who fear him, that glory may dwell in our land.
• Psalm 76:7‭-‬10 – But you, you are to be feared! Who can stand before you when once your anger is roused? From the heavens you uttered judgment; the earth feared and was still, when God arose to establish judgment, to save all the humble of the earth. Selah Surely the wrath of man shall praise you; the remnant of wrath you will put on like a belt. 
• Psalm 34:7‭-‬9 – The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear him, and delivers them. Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good! Blessed is the man who takes refuge in him! Oh, fear the Lord, you his saints, for those who fear him have no lack!
• Psalm 60:4 – You have set up a banner for those who fear you, that they may flee to it from the bow. Selah
• Proverbs 29:25 – The fear of man lays a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is safe.
• Psalm 145:17‭-‬20 – The Lord is righteous in all his ways and kind in all his works. The Lord is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth. He fulfills the desire of those who fear him; he also hears their cry and saves them. The Lord preserves all who love him, but all the wicked he will destroy.
• Psalm 115:9‭-‬15 – O Israel, trust in the Lord! He is their help and their shield. O house of Aaron, trust in the Lord! He is their help and their shield. You who fear the Lord, trust in the Lord! He is their help and their shield. The Lord has remembered us; he will bless us; he will bless the house of Israel; he will bless the house of Aaron; he will bless those who fear the Lord, both the small and the great. May the Lord give you increase, you and your children! May you be blessed by the Lord, who made heaven and earth!

He provides PURITY 

• Proverbs 8:13 – The fear of the Lord is hatred of evil. Pride and arrogance and the way of evil and perverted speech I hate.
• Exodus 20:20-‬21 – Moses said to the people, “Do not fear, for God has come to test you, that the fear of him may be before you, that you may not sin.” The people stood far off, while Moses drew near to the thick darkness where God was.

Whew! That was a lot. See what I mean? If we call on the Name of Christ, it is our duty to have a holy, reverent fear of God, no matter what. But what tremendous blessings He brings with it in His kindness! There are so many other verses about fearing the LORD as well, and I encourage you to explore this topic yourself. 

So, since this is the Strategic Families podcast, we need to apply this beautiful concept to family life. What does it look like to fear the LORD in our homes and to teach our children to fear the LORD? As with any important aspect of family life, as parents we must always do two things: teach it and model it. We can’t miss either of these. If we just teach it but don’t model it, our kids will believe our words to be hollow. If we just model it and don’t teach it, our kids may not pick up on it or think of it as generic wisdom. We need to do both.

But before we do any of that, we must make sure that WE OURSELVES fear the LORD. So, how can we as parents grow in our fear of the LORD? Here are a couple of ways.

First, pray that God would give you a fear of Him. I believe this is a gift from Him and one that we can grow in over time. We are most likely NOT just going to naturally fear Him – left to ourselves, we are way more likely to fear the culture or fear man or fear circumstances. 

Next, I encourage you – and I encourage myself – to memorize a verse or two on fearing the LORD. We’ve looked at a bunch of them in this episode, and these are all in the blog post and in the show notes for this episode if you’d like to take one or more of them to memorize. Hiding His Word in our hearts is an awesome way for us to remember what He’s called us to!

Lastly, takes notes or journal, based on your daily decisions and determine if there may be a lack of fear of the LORD. Ask yourself: “Are there areas in my life where, if I’m honest with myself, I really have no regard for what the LORD wants or how I’m conducting my life pleases Him?” If so, that’s a great area to bring before the LORD and ask Him to change you.

OK, before we move on, a word of encouragement here. We do NOT need to wait until we’re perfect in this area to pass this along to our kids. Yes, hypocrisy is a thing and we should absolutely care. And while God absolutely wants us to strive for holiness – He says, “You shall be holy, for I am holy” (see 1 Peter 1:16) – do not let your struggle in this area keep you from helping your kids see that fearing the LORD is a good and right thing. Think about it: if you struggled with eating junk food, would you not still want to help your kids see that junk food is not good for them? Of course you would.

OK, with that in mind, let’s look at how we might teach and model this for our kids:

1. Suggestion #1 – Take a week at dinner time and read any one of the verses we’ve talked about each night. Explain to your kids what God is saying and why it’s important to you. Expand it to include how you can practice that in your home. Get their thoughts on it. It could be 5 minutes, but that will be a super-strategic 5 minutes! This entire episode is posted as a blog, so head over to StrategicFamilies.com to see the transcript.
2. Suggestion #2 – Ask your kids to look in their Bible’s concordance for verses on fear of the LORD and tell them to bring a verse to the dinner table. Asking them to do a little work ahead of time will help the concept sink in better.
3. Suggestion #3 – If you don’t read the news or participate in social media, GREAT for you! If you do, chances are, sadly, that you will come across many examples of a LACK of fear of the LORD. In an age-appropriate way, read one or two of them to your kids. Connect it to the fear of the LORD and explain why this situation would be so much better if people did what God said rather than followed their own devices and desires. Quote the Scripture or Scriptures that, if the person had followed it, would have enabled peace or contentment or flourishing. I believe it’s important for our kids to see the connection between what God’s Word calls us to and what we see in the real world. Remember, His Word is living and active. Everything in it is useful for teaching us, rebuking us, correcting us and training us in righteousness so that His people can be thoroughly equipped for every good work.

Those are just a few suggestions of how you can put this into practice and be strategic with this topic in your family life.

So, let’s not think of fearing the LORD as some outdated concept that doesn’t apply to us, or one that won’t have any effect on our lives. It ABSOLUTELY applies to us and far from not having an effect, our embracing of it or rejection of it will have tremendous consequences. It’s so important that our kids see this. As they grow, they must understand that not fearing Him leads to discontentment and disaster, and that fearing Him leads to life and peace! After hearing from God’s Word on this, I hope you’re more convinced than ever of just how beautiful a thing it is to fear God and to lovingly obey Him.

OK, that’s all we have for today. Thanks so much for listening. Have an awesome 2024 and we’ll see you next time!